I really don’t know what’s wrong with me lately. I’m so upset all of the time. I’m dealing with so much, so much that I can’t even begin to explain and no one even knows. The littlest things bother me so much. I’m filled with so many bad qualities and I wish I was a better person. I wish I could smile without it being forced and fake. I wish I could sincerely feel happy. I feel so alone. I have no one. I honestly have no one. I’m just stuck in this sadness with no way out. I feel like I’m pushing people away and I’m so scared that I’m going to lose people I care about. I’m starting to feel things happen that have happened in the past…things I never wanted to happen again. Things that I want to avoid, but can’t seem to. I feel so unwanted and unimportant. I feel like I don’t matter. I feel like if I wasn’t here, no one care or even notice. I don’t know who I am anymore. I don’t know why I’m not good enough. I’m just a worthless person filling up empty space, I have no worth. Everyone I know is a better person than me. Everyone is prettier. Everyone is more fun. Everyone is cooler. Everyone is more fun to be around and I’m just here, being nothing and being a bother to everyone I come in contact with. I’ve finally realized that no one cares. No one cares like I do. I invest so much time and effort into trying to make others happy and to let them know how special they are and how much they mean to me, but I feel like all it does is make people think I’m strange. Maybe I should stop. I want to believe people care, but how could they? What do I have to offer anyone? Nothing. I’m always sad but it’s been much worse these past few days. It’s not going away. I’m so sad. I’m just a loser. I’m lost and I wish I could find myself. I don’t matter. I never will matter and I need to get that through my head. I’m nothing.
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500blogsofkayla: I really don’t know what’s wrong with me lately. I’m so upset all of the time....
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